I’m in heaven now, sitting on Jesus’ lap. He loves me and cries with me, for my heart is broken. I so much wanted to be your little girl. I don’t quite understand what has happened. I was so excited when I began to realize my existence. I was in a dark, yet comfortable place. I saw that I had fingers and toes and I was pretty far along in my developing, yet not near ready to leave my surroundings. I spent most of my time thinking or sleeping.
Even from the earliest days, I felt a special bonding between us. Sometimes I heard you crying and I cried with you. Sometimes you would yell or scream, then cry, I heard daddy yelling back. I was sad, and hoped you would be better soon. I wondered why you cried so much.
One day you cried almost the entire day. I hurt for you. I couldn’t imagine why you were so unhappy. That same day, the most horrible thing happened. A very mean monster came into my warm comfortable place. I was so scared, and I began screaming but there was no sound. I guess they had you pinned down, because you never once tried to help me. The monster came closer and closer as I was screaming and screaming until I couldn’t anymore.
Then the monster started ripping my arms and legs off and it hurt so bad. The pain, I could never explain it. It never stopped. Oh how I begged it to stop. OH! I screamed in horror, though I was in such complete pain, I realized I was dying. I knew I would never see your face or hear you tell me how much you loved me. I wanted to make all of your tears go away. I had plans to make you happy. Now I couldn’t.
All my dreams were shattered. Though I was in shear pain and horror, I could feel the pain of my heart breaking. Above all else I wanted more than anything to be your daughter. It was now too late for I was dying a very painful death. I could only imagine what terrible things they had done to you. I wanted to tell you I love you before I was gone, but I didn’t know the words you could understand.
Very soon I no longer had the breath to say them; I was dead… I then felt myself rising. I was carried by a huge angel into a beautiful place. I was still crying, but the physical pain was gone. The angel took me to Jesus and set me on his lap. He said he loves me, and that he was my father. Then I was happy.
I asked him what the thing was that killed me? He answered “ABORTION”. “I’m sorry, my child; for I know how it feels”. I don’t know what abortion is, I guess that’s the name of the monster. I’m writing to say that I love you and to tell you how much I wanted to be your little girl. I tried very hard to live.
I wanted to live. I had the will, but just couldn’t, the monster was too powerful. It sucked my arms and legs off, ripping them from my sockets with great pain, and finally got all of me. It was impossible to live. I just wanted you to know that I tried to stay with you. I didn’t want to leave you. Also mommy, please watch out for the ABORTION MONSTER.
Mommy I love you very much and would hate for you to go through the kind of pain and suffering I did. Please be careful.
Your Baby Girl